Oral Irregularity

There once was a man named Belini,

Who spilt some gin on his weenie.

Just to be cooth,

He added vermouth,

And slipped his girlfriend a martini.

 

There was an old fellow of Brest

Who sucked off his wife with a zest.

Despite her great howls

He sucked out her bowels,

And spat them all over her chest.

 

There was a young fellow of Buckingham,

Wrote a treatise on cunts and on sucking them,

But later his work

Was eclipsed by a Turk

Who topic was assholes and fucking them.

 

There once was a cuntlapper’s daughter

Who, despite all her father had taught her,

Would become so unstrung

At the touch of a tongue

That she’d deluge her beau with her water.

 

A Roman of old named Horatio

Was fond of a form of fellatio.

He kept accurate track

Of the boys he’d attack,

And called it his cock-sucking ratio.

 

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A drinking club with a running problem

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